types of gays: house edition (note: im using gay as an umbrella term!)
cottage gay: likes tea, artsy, good w plants, apologizes too much, dies every time someone complements them, lives in their own fantasies, doing their best but never thinks so
penthouse gay: art deco, expensive drinks, cherries and pomegranates, doesn’t close their blinds, knows the name of their barista, loves sunsets and fancy lingerie
castle gay: would have a closet for their capes, four-poster bed with three duvets, probably needs smelling salts, easily digresses, candles and dinner parties
lodge gay: reclusive, opens up to 3 (three) people in their entire lifetime, loves tapestries, hardworking, loves sleeping, could sit outside for hours, listens 2 folk music
tree house gay: has terrible handwriting, never too many throw pillows, constantly anxious, string lights and lava lamps, has taken a ceramic class, loves rice
There’s this sense of reckless bravery that short people have and tall people lack.
Like, the second I climb a fucking counter to get to a cupboard? Suddenly, I’m kissing death cus I could fall and break my head.
This one time I jerry-rigged the house satellite. I had to climb to the roof using the backyard door because the ladder was stored two feet too high for me to reach.
At work? We have this freezer full of steel storage shelves. We put our most commonly used item on the very top of the fucking shelf. My 6’0 tall manager asked me to get a box of these items and I went to the freezer, climbed up the shelf, and started pulling on this thirty pound box. That was when he bursted into the freezer, tried to stop me, but it was too late. The box slid off the shelf and I smoothly caught it around my arms. And he just went “you could’ve killed yourself jesus christ…” and I looked at him dead in the eyes and said “I know, but you gave me a job to do”
TLDR: short people would literally risk their lives to prove to tall people that their height won’t stop them, and tall people just want short people to chill out and ask for help.
do you ever see a really pretty girl and your brain just short circuits? like you literally can’t think of anything but the pretty girl and it’s just?? wow! gay!
honestly the amount of crushes I had on girls as a youth but didn’t recognise because the only option offered to me was heterosexuality is mind-blowing
the1timetraveller 